The Last Wagon Crossing

Today was a sad day as thousands came, and with hundreds stuck in traffic to witness this historical event. The event was in the planning for year, and the time had finally come. The location was Glenns Ferry, Idaho. More specifically, the Three Islands Crossing. The he wonderful folks here had been holding the historical reenactment of the Oregon Trail Settlers crossing the hazardous Snake River yearly for the last 24 years.

Over the years, the locals have done their best to make it as realistic as possible for the people who came from far and near to see how it was done, and even witness firsthand the perils of the crossing. This was going to be their last year because time is catching up to all of those who actually know how to handle a team of horses and the wagon on a river crossing.

The movies really don’t do it justice. In one sense it seems like a simple thing to cross a river, and the small crew, (down to one wagon, a few horses, and a couple of mules) made it look easy. At the most dangerous point in the crossing, it becomes obvious everyone is swimming, and the wagon is floating down stream. The powerful river sweeps them faster down stream then their progress across it.

I have been on the river many times, and the Snake River has a way of getting your attention even while you’re up on plane in a large Jet boat. The river is very deceptive, so you would have a hard time convincing me to try and cross it on a horse, but make it a team of horses with a wagon, and the answer would be a flat “No!”.

I was honored to be able to witness the bravery of the men and women who donned on authentic costumes, and handled the cold water with smiles on their faces. The narrator helped bring an understanding of the true history, and the real peril the settler faced, and how the Indians were such a large help in getting the West settled. There is a ton of information available on the internet, but it pales in comparison to actually seeing and hearing about it from real people with a passion in their graveled voices.

It was hard for me to go to this event because I just hate being around crowds. If there was choice between going to the dentist and having my wisdom teeth pulled again, or going to a large event, I would choose the dentist, but I am grateful I didn’t find another excuse not to attend a large event. I had a wonderful experience hearing about the struggle of the settlers, and seeing what they went through first hand. If you are one of the many who got to share in my experience, you know what I mean. If you don’t know, then you should just stick to watching your sensationalized TV shows. You probably think reality shows are real too.

Like a lot of people, I complain about how things are now a days, wishing for simpler times, but after hearing, and seeing what the settlers had to go through, I feel ashamed. Some things were definitely simpler back in our near history, but the simplest of things could get you killed, and quickly. As a Simple Bear, I will stick with the simple things we have now, and just enjoy. The biggest think I learned today, was to enjoy what I have.

Friends

I am sure a politician’s favorite saying is, “You can never have too many friends.” In a sense I can agree with that, but there is another saying which also rings true of the politician, “With friends like you, who needs enemies.” I know there are some who really want to help, but let’s be honest, how many more laws do we really need, especially when we can’t fully police the laws we already have. Then you have the lawyers in our legal system who have twisted things to unrecognizable understandings by anyone. Sorry, had to vent.

I am blessed to know quite a few people, and most of them I can call my friend to one degree or another. How many true friends do I have, who are actually concerned about me, I don’t know. I know I have a few, but last Sunday I was blessed with finding out I have one more.
Without going into boring details, I will just say last weekend wasn’t a good weekend for me. Normally I can put on a good face when I am around others, but Sunday, I just didn’t care. Oh, I tried since it was Mother’s Day, but my heart wasn’t in it. When I got to church everyone asks the normal question about how things are going, and I gave my normal answer when things aren’t going very good, by saying “It’s just another day in paradise.” This translates to not worth a s..t.

This works out fine, because I learned a long time ago, most people really only want you to tell them everything is fine, because they don’t want to have to take the time to listen to your problems. They have enough problems of their own, and have no desire to hear about any more. There’s a small part of me that does understand, but only a small part for when they have a problem I am usually lucky enough to hear all about it, but once I have listened, and offered my encouragement, their off and running again, forgetting I understood their problem, because I am going through the same thing myself, but they don’t want to hear about that.

I know some of you are probably saying, “Well if they won’t listen to you when you have a problem, don’t listen to them when they have a problem.” It sounds good in theory, and I tried it once a long time ago back in school. I ended up having teachers tell my parents, I wasn’t very helpful any more, and had a bad attitude. I had to learn the hard way that once you’re labeled a nice guy, you’re cursed to always be the nice guy. I don’t mean to sound cynical, for I have been able to meet some really interesting people because they felt safe to talk with me.

Back to my friend. I called him one and would gladly help him out whenever he needed it, but I will be honest, I didn’t know if it was a two way street. I have learned the hard way you just never know. Out of all of the people I met a church who asked me how I was, he took the time to see through the smoke screen, and asked me about it repeatedly.

Hear was my chance to finally talk about my problems with someone who would listen to me, and guess what happened? I found I didn’t really have anything to say. My problems weren’t anything anyone could fix, or that needed to be fixed. Just the thought of having someone who was truly willing to listen to me, encouraged me, and that was all I needed. It was just nice to be noticed.

With the hustle and bustle of life which keeps increasing with every passing minute of the clock, it seems to be getting harder and harder to get noticed by others. To get noticed by others it seems you have to really stand out, one way or another, and a lot of the ways people are trying to stand out aren’t healthy. I wonder if we would have all of the problems in the world today, if we would all just take a minute to truly notice someone each day. To ask someone how they are doing, and to go the extra mile to make sure they really are fine. My advice is to start with at least one person a day, and grow it to as many people as you can, and watch the world brighten around you each and every day. My world was truly brightened, because one person went the mile to show they really cared.

Secret to a Happy Marriage

I once heard the true secret to a happy marriage was not to get married at all. Those who have recently gone through an ugly divorce probably would agree with that. Although I can sympathize with those who have had problems, I cannot agree with them. This summer my wife and I will be celebrating our 20th anniversary.

I remember when we were going through premarital counseling with the preacher, he said the life expectancy of a marriage back then was only 7 years. He told us we were going to have to work at staying together, and not to take light our responsibilities. My wonderful wife to be, and I listened to him, but neither one of us understood what he was talking about. We had been living in sin (together) for a year when we went through his premarital counseling, and for us the wedding was strictly a formality.

20 years later, nothing has changed for us. Neither one of us understand when people keep telling us you have to work to keep a marriage together. No I am not saying we have never had our disagreements, or full out arguments, but the option of getting a divorce was never, and still isn’t an option. We know in spite of our little differences, we are much better together then we are apart.

I met a couple last fall, who are in their nineties, and they have been married for 70 years. What caught my attention was the way they act around each other. Most people who I have seen who have been together a long time, usually end up just staying together out of duty, but this couple is still happy to be together. This wasn’t just a face put on in front of a stranger, this was real.
I asked them why they thought they had such a good marriage while so many others couldn’t seem to last a couple of years. In one word they agreed it was “trust”. They trusted each other completely, and in everything, without stipulations. They talked about how they trusted each other with money, and not cheating on one another, but the one thing they didn’t say, but was understood, was they trusted each other to stick around when things didn’t go according to plan, or hopes. This included when one spouse or the other, on the rare occasion acted human, and hurt the others feelings.

I don’t care who you are, by the time you lost your first baby tooth you’ve had your feelings hurt. It is a natural part of life, just like falling down every now and then and skinning your knee. The question is, are you going to just lay there on the ground crying poor me, and give up on life, or are you going to get up, and try walking again? I know there are times I’ve hurt my wife’s feelings, and when I am made aware of it, I truly feel bad, for I never intend to hurt her, and thankfully she knows this, just as I know she doesn’t mean to hurt my feelings.

The heart of the matter is just that the heart of it. Does the person who hurt your feeling mean to, and if so why? If you just get mad without ever finding out the answers to those questions, you are destined to fail in any relationship. We are all human destined to make mistakes, and sometimes the mistake is thinking two wrongs make a right.

Marriage isn’t about work, it’s about trust. Ultimately before you ever think about marriage you need to ask yourself if you can trust the other’s heart completely. If you can’t you need to ask yourself why. Is it something about the other person, or is it about you? If you got married before you ever answered those questions, you both need to answer the questions right away. If the answer isn’t completely, than you’re going to have to fix it, and because you put the cart before the horse, you might have to actually work at getting trust built up in the relationship. Can it be done, you bet. Is it worth it, without question!

One last thing, if you do have to work at getting things fixed, make the work fun, like building the ultimate sand castle, not like mucking out the barn. This is your chance to really learn about the other person, and for them to learn about you, let the experience be fun, and ongoing.

Family Time

Hard Work

A great man once said, “I have a Dream!”, and it was a good one. All men and women need to have a dream. The greatness of the dream isn’t as important as the dream itself. A person without a dream for something better for themselves, is a person without any hope, and a questionable reason to exist at all.

A dream can be as farfetched as you want. If you want to build a space ship like the “Enterprise” on “Star Trek”, than go for it, as long as you work at, and just don’t sit around talking about over a beer with friends. By working hard towards something, no matter how outlandish it seems, you have given your life purpose, and through your perseverance, you provide hope to others. I can’t think of anything nobler than bring hope to other.

A dream without any hard work is just a fantasy, and a fantasy no matter how wonderful doesn’t do anyone any good, not even the person with the fantasy. If Marten Luther King Jr. had just sat around fantasizing about his dream, just think what sad state of affairs our world would be. He might have had a longer life span, but never truly lived. Thankfully for us all, he put great effort into his dream, and we are all enjoying the fruits of his labor.

The key to a great dream are in 2 four letter words, Hard Work. Some would say people don’t know how to work, let alone hard work, but I have to wonder if it’s because they have been stripped of their reward for hard work. The famous words of our Declaration of Independence, quoted by Marten Luther states, “All men are created equal”, has been twisted to meaningless proportions.

We are all created equal, but it doesn’t mean we are all the same, nor should we be. We are all equal in our right to pursue happiness, but we are not the same in what makes us happy. Some need 5 million in assets to make them happy, and others are happy to have five bucks in the wallet. Injustice comes when people are made to feel bad for having more, or less than others. Why make me eat lobster, when I prefer a hamburger.

The popularity of “Sameness”, otherwise known as Socialism, has left many feeling guilty for wanting more, and to be different. With guilt replacing reward, the main incentive for hard work has been taken away. In the process changing many dreams into just fantasies, and crippling hope in general.

I never knew Martin Luther, nor am I great historian who has studied him, but from reading his speech, I believe his dream was for all people to be equal, not the same. I am sure some will want to debate with me on his meaning of words, but let’s focus on his example of his hard work. Let our hard work be a beacon of light, and hope to others, as we pursue our dreams.

Gifts

As a Christian, this is one subject I could easily bring up the gift of Christ, but that seems to be such a turn off for some, so I will reframe from making this a religious story, and just cover the events in one of my recent weeks.

As a person geared more to things of old, like typewriters, instead of computers, I have been kind of slow coming into the 21st century. This all changed 6 months ago, believe it or not, due to a typewriter, but I will save that story for another time.

A few weeks ago I met a young person in one of the forums I now frequent, who was stressing about the need of a typewriter, but no funds. I had an extra typewriter which was in great shape, a fresh ribbon, with its only flaw being a color I hadn’t fallen in love with. Since it was given to me, the only proper thing to do was to give it to someone else who wanted it. I thought I had found this person, and even offered to pay for the shipping.

Over the course of a week, and many emails, I was left with no real decision of acceptance (no address given to send it), or declining. I even gave references of character, with phone numbers to easily check, including my local sheriff, whom I have worked for. Personally I would have accepted a yes or no, without problem, but the wishy, washy, undecidedness took the joy right out of the giving.

This brings me to the very next week. Through another forum discussing keyboards, I asked about availability of a special two piece keyboard for my wife. A couple of quick responses helped me find just what my wife needed. I thanked them very much for the info, and mentioned we are now saving up for one. I then took a couple of days off from the computer, to finish typing out my book (hopefully coming out this fall). Yes, I know shameless plug.

When I got back to check my email, I found one from a gentleman on the forum for keyboards wondering if I had seen his post. In short, he wanted to donate the money for a keyboard for my wife. I was surprised, and flabbergasted, to say the least. I didn’t even know this person, and not being one who has never received a gift from a stranger, I didn’t know what to do. Normally I am the one doing the giving, but if I was to learn anything from the previous week, I had a decision to make.

I politely, humbly, and with great thanks, accepted his gift. I didn’t accept just for my wife and mine’s sake, but also for the person giving us the gift. You see when the other person didn’t except my gift, two people missed out on its joy, them and me. I find great joy in giving, and that was taken away from me.

If you ever want to have fun during Christmas time, or any time, pay for the person’s stuff in the checkout line before you. Or if you want to double the fun, give the money to the checkout person, and let them decide whose stuff it should be used for. You both get the gift of giving. Something tells me, if more found the joy of giving, there would be less need in the world.

The Unskilled Technician

An unskilled technician sounds just as likely as responsible government spending. A technician is supposed to be skilled in their given field. If they are not then they are called trainees.

I just got back from a sales meeting where the manufacture was showing those of us in my field the lasted products to make our lives, and the customer’s life easier. The presentation was dry, but the products were a great improvement, enough so, you wonder why they didn’t do it earlier. What caught me by surprise was one of my fellow tradesman. He wanted to know if the new product was idiot proof enough to keep someone from installing a wire without stripping the wire back far enough. To put this into perspective the wire needed to be stripped back between ¼” to ½”. He was worried that his guys wouldn’t strip the wire back far enough, and a couple of other people joined in, worried about the same thing. The question, I have is, if there technician is skilled enough to hook up a couple of dozen wires to a control panel, how can they not be skilled enough to strip the wires back the proper distance.

In the days not to long past we used to have to make our own control center with relays and individually wire them together. Now with today’s electronics what we use to do with dozens of relays, can be controlled with on electronic panel that works much better.

Every day there are new tools coming out in the industries across the board, which are designed to help the unskilled do their job. The tools don’t make things faster or better for those who are skilled, usually it’s just the opposite, but they are here because the skilled work force has been declining at an alarming rate. I don’t know if its laziness, or if people are just not caring, but for some reason people aren’t wanting to learn. Maybe their just too impatience to take the time to learn, or they never experience the simple wonderful joy of learning and improving their ability.

I wish I was talking about just our younger generation, but unfortunately I have noticed parents and grand parents acting the same way.

This is America, the land of the Free and the Proud. Its time we rolled up our sleeves and got to work, and stopped excepting mediocrity from everything, including ourselves.